scary (from a Procrastinators P.O.V.)

I FEEL like I have so much to do, but most of you would be like are you crazy? thats like  NOTHING, compared to what I do in a day!! quit bitching ya dumb bitch. and actually NOTHINGhas to be done until march, but being the procrastinator that I am (I woke up @ 9:30, for an appt I had @ 10am). I know that I should just start doing it now, and it all seems so damn overwhelming, and its actually scary, because if I do this and get it done, that means,I am getting my shit together.

now for me that is scary, ME have my shit together? who would’ve thunk it? there was one point in my life where I did have my shit together, I had a good paying job, and I was happy with life, but I don’t know what happened to it.

I really wanna get back to having my shit together, but its scary!! why is it so scary? I don’t actually know @ this point, I can’t put my figure on it at this time, its just scary.

so (da da da) here is what I have to do.

• get my financial aid started and done, to start school in march.
• get son signed up for daycare.
• find a backup daycare to take him when he gets sick.
• find some type of employment til march

I know that don’t seem like alot to alot of people, who do  WAAYmore than that each and everyday, but to a QUEEN PROCRASTINATOR! it is very much to do, and it is MUST be dones!

Procrastination is like ANOREXIA  of the mind, E.G. anorexics(spelled wrong?) won’t eat, do to the fact that they feel every little calorie they eat will put POUNDS on their body  and they always see their selves as fat.(something like that) Procrastinators will put things off, for the fact that if they do it, they will have some unknown change, for better or worse, there will be a change.

nevermind, I confused myself. I know what I wanna say, and maybe you get the point of what I am trying to say, but to me it’s not coming out right anyway, why? because I am so OVERWHELMED.

waah..